On hickeys, in general.
A certain someone I know (no names will be mentioned for the sake of protecting the innocent individual who apparently enjoys seventh grade makeout sessions) has a hickey right now. As my parenthetical may lead one to believe, I find these wildly amusing. I was in fourth grade when I had my first hickey. Well, I say hickey. I'm not sure if they count if they are accidentally self-inflicted, but I'm going to go with it.
I was bored in Hebrew school class, as those of you who are Jewish know we are wont to be, and I had my head resting on my desk, with my mouth in the inside crook of my elbow. I believe I was thinking about vampires, or leeches, or whatever kids think about in fourth grade, and I was sucking on the skin right inside my arm. As I pulled my mouth away, I noticed a distinct ring of saliva, in addition to a weird...mark in the center. At first, I was grossed out, and thought I had been sucking on some kind of marker or skin mishap, or something. I tried rubbing at it, and it wouldn't go away. I was a really paranoid kid, so I started to freak a little. I went to the bathroom and tried to wash it off, and it wouldn't go away. I scrubbed it with soap, and no dice. I spent the rest of the day worrying about my potentially lethal skin condition until I got home and talked to my mom, who laughed at me and told me it was nothing to worry about. She was right, it went away in a day or two.
Now that I think about it, my first accidental hickey actually happened a year or two before, when I was trying to impress my little cousin and I stuck a suction-cupped rattle to my forehead like a unicorn. This was a great game to play for a few minutes, but after it started to hurt a little, I pulled the sucker off, and had a perfect bruise-y circle on my forehead. It would have been scary if I already didn't look like a monster, all gangly and missing front teeth and such. My grandmother still has my summer camp picture from the day or two after this happened sitting on a dresser at her house, and every time I look at it, I recoil a little.
As far as actual first hickeys go, I may have had one before this, but the one I distinctly remember happened in ninth grade. It was at a youth group event, and someone thought it would be hysterical to pin me, the shy newbie (seriously, I was INCREDIBLY shy through most of high school...just like now, right?) down and suck on my neck. It hurt like hell, and I had a massive bruise on my neck for a week that I had no experience covering up, and therefore just aired for the world to see. It was awkward, in retrospect.
I still think they hurt like hell. I don't see the need. All of you hickey-ed people out there (and at least one of you know who you are), move on. There are easier ways to mark your territory. I'd go for matching his and hers "I'm With Stupid" shirts.
I was bored in Hebrew school class, as those of you who are Jewish know we are wont to be, and I had my head resting on my desk, with my mouth in the inside crook of my elbow. I believe I was thinking about vampires, or leeches, or whatever kids think about in fourth grade, and I was sucking on the skin right inside my arm. As I pulled my mouth away, I noticed a distinct ring of saliva, in addition to a weird...mark in the center. At first, I was grossed out, and thought I had been sucking on some kind of marker or skin mishap, or something. I tried rubbing at it, and it wouldn't go away. I was a really paranoid kid, so I started to freak a little. I went to the bathroom and tried to wash it off, and it wouldn't go away. I scrubbed it with soap, and no dice. I spent the rest of the day worrying about my potentially lethal skin condition until I got home and talked to my mom, who laughed at me and told me it was nothing to worry about. She was right, it went away in a day or two.
Now that I think about it, my first accidental hickey actually happened a year or two before, when I was trying to impress my little cousin and I stuck a suction-cupped rattle to my forehead like a unicorn. This was a great game to play for a few minutes, but after it started to hurt a little, I pulled the sucker off, and had a perfect bruise-y circle on my forehead. It would have been scary if I already didn't look like a monster, all gangly and missing front teeth and such. My grandmother still has my summer camp picture from the day or two after this happened sitting on a dresser at her house, and every time I look at it, I recoil a little.
As far as actual first hickeys go, I may have had one before this, but the one I distinctly remember happened in ninth grade. It was at a youth group event, and someone thought it would be hysterical to pin me, the shy newbie (seriously, I was INCREDIBLY shy through most of high school...just like now, right?) down and suck on my neck. It hurt like hell, and I had a massive bruise on my neck for a week that I had no experience covering up, and therefore just aired for the world to see. It was awkward, in retrospect.
I still think they hurt like hell. I don't see the need. All of you hickey-ed people out there (and at least one of you know who you are), move on. There are easier ways to mark your territory. I'd go for matching his and hers "I'm With Stupid" shirts.
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